One, of course, is ethyl alcohol. And President George W. Bush, no less, and by his own admission, was smashed or tiddley-poo or four sheets to the wind a good deal of the time from when he was 16 until he was 41. When he was 41, he says, Jesus appeared to him and made him knock off the sauce, stop gargling nose paint.
Other drunks have seen pink elephants.
And do you know why I think he is so pissed off at Arabs? They invented algebra.
We’re spreading democracy, are we? Same way European explorers brought Christianity to the Indians, what we now call “Native Americans.”
How ungrateful they were! How ungrateful are the people of Baghdad today.
So let’s give another big tax cut to the super-rich. That’ll teach bin Laden a lesson he won’t soon forget.
Статья "Cold Turkey" здесь. По жж ходит много цитат из переводной статьи, насколько я понимаю, отсюда. Перевод слабый, а главное - пропущено много предложений. Сначала я подумала, что их просто трудно было перевести, но потом стало понятно, что скорее всего опущены были фразы, не вписывающиеся в общую канву стеба. Например,
If some of you still haven’t decided, I’ll make it easy for you.
If you want to take my guns away from me, and you’re all for murdering fetuses, and love it when homosexuals marry each other, and want to give them kitchen appliances at their showers, and you’re for the poor, you’re a liberal.
If you are against those perversions and for the rich, you’re a conservative.
Последняя фраза в русском переводе пропущена. А ведь она поворачивает все предыдущее в нужное русло.